Anyone who knows me well knows that I am not above reproach. I may seem perfect in everyone’s eyes (okay, maybe just in my and my dog’s eyes) but I will accept constructive criticism with grace. Or so I thought.
Last week, I took my kids to a homeschooling bowling event for the first time. It was around noon time and DH was in town working at the office so I called him at the last minute to see if perhaps he was able to join us. Turns out he could! Yay!
Upon arrival we were assigned to a lane with two other moms and their kids and the bowling fun began. During one of the kids’ turns, I sat down next to one of the moms (to protect her privacy I’ll refer to her as Nanny-nanny Phoo-phoo…or NP for short) and began engaging in a discussion about the curriculum du jour. Midway through my (or perhaps even her) sentence, I noticed out of the corner of my eye that DH had just torn open a bag of Skittles from the vending machine and proceeded to pop handfuls of the stuff into his mouth. Without hesitation and with escalation I yelled “N-n-n-n-n-n-NO!”…complete with the finger wave, mind you. “What are you DOING?!? Don’t let the kids see you eat that stuff! They’ll want it and you’ll go back to work and leave me with completely overwound kids!” Or something to that affect. My DH obligingly (as always) stuffed the candy into his shirt pocket. At which point I turned back to continue the conversation I was having with NP when she very unexpectedly and very BOLDLY chastised me for addressing my husband as I would one of my children. She did so using humor so as not to completely embarrass me, however, even the slightest of embarrassment may cause me to object in situations like this. And I did. I said, “NP! You don’t KNOW what I have to deal with at my house!” This was my very feeble attempt at justifying my behaviour. But NP stood her ground…as she should have. I glanced at my DH with a sheepish heart but he was completely oblivious. Obviously very accustomed to my awful behavior.
That was a week ago and that afternoon continues to haunt me…repeating itself over and over and over again in my mind. It’s true. I have been known to treat my DH in that manner now and again. Okay, maybe more than now and again. If I’ve done it once, I’ve done it once too many. He’s definitely more deserving than that and my kids deserve to see mommies treat daddies with honor and respect.
We have a long overdue date night tomorrow night. He’ll receive my full, humbling, heartfelt apology at that time. And he, in turn, will be completely confounded because he has ADHD and has no short term memory whatsoever. A blessing at times, I suppose.
Thanks for the character check, NP. I don’t think I could ever have been as bold as you if I were faced with the same situation but I’m certainly grateful that you were. Feel free to check me anytime. The whole “it takes a village” concept doesn’t just apply to kids. We grownups need it, too. Sometimes more than the kids do.